Sonofa!

Damn it Lindsay, why you gotta be such a train wreck? I love you, and I know you have it in you to become the successful actress you want to be. But unfortunately, you have nutbag parents who totally screwed you up for life. Stop using drugs as a crutch for your pain and deal with it. Everyone has crappy families but you don't see all of us hoovering up our life savings.

Having said that, I still think you're hot and awesome and I'm totally still going to see I Know Who Killed Me this weekend, but I would just really appreciate it if you didn't make me feel like my admission fee was going to give a junkie more money to buy drugs.